As I feel it, I take it all in

Hello. Im back!

Have you ever tried to move on from someone? Someone you love the most?

I know how it feels. 

After breaking up with my ex boyfriend 3 years ago, I thought everything's gonna be alright. But nah, it took years to move on. Lol I feel stupid right now but yeah, its true aha.

Seeing everyone move on first. I started to wonder, how?
Why am I the only one hurting? Why am I the only one crying? 

Dont you feel the same? Of course you dont, you're still young. I get it.

Its my fault too. I left you, never think about your feelings. I was too dumb.

I still remember, I was the one who suffer a lot. Having my hard time. Alone.

Well, its not your fault. But, I hope you miss me. Cause I miss you every second, every minute, every day. 

We didnt talk after that. And again, its cause of my fault.

So, I met someone a year later. He's nice. A good listener. A good friend. The funniest (Idk how to spell...) guy. I like him.

I felt so happy cause finally I can forget about you. SO HAPPY.

We didnt talked for the whole year. I saw you everyday in school. You looked at me and I do the same. Lol awkward...

This year, he talked to me again. Like a lot. So, I guess, we're okay now. Hmm yes, we are.

Cause of Kadet Polis and tuition. We spend much time together.

He tell jokes and made me laugh. Until I didnt realize I was laughing too much. He even asked me to control the way I laugh cause Im a girl. Like seriously? HAHA. But at least, he still cares.

And I think I fell in love with the same guy again.

Things just happened to be that way. AGAIN.

But the problem is, he's too young for me. I mean, not too young. But still, he's younger than me.

I have always been scared of being myself. I am that thin line in between everything.

I should not have said this much, this is all I wanted to say.

See ya soon.